Rebecca West: Words & Music

Our Online Romance
by Rebecca and Bob West with the Holy Spirit

Chapter 9

Surviving Emotional Trauma




From: Rebecca
Subject: Rebecca is sleepy
Date: March 31, 2009, 9:31 PM
To: Bob


Hello dear friend!


Thank you for that video -- I really enjoyed it. So beautiful.


I ate a little dinner ---- and then went to sleep on the sofa.
You mentioned a cleaning lady for your house. I hope it works out for you. I think that is a good idea. You could make a list of everything you want her to do each week. Of course, that's me. I make lists for everything, but it seems to work for me. Then, as each thing is completed, I check it off of the list. This may be helpful to your house heeper, to give her a guideline of what you expect. Does she bring her own cleaning products or do you supply them? Anyway --- it will be great for you. I think it would be great to have a housekeeper!


I think I will go to bed early tonight. I just finished calling the members for our class for tomorrow (Wednesday) night. Fred always likes for me to make reminder calls.


Tomorrow about 11 a.m. I am going to meet my sister, Barbara, and another girl from church, Kelly, the keyboard player, for lunch at a little cafe. Kelly wanted to take Barb out for her birthday, and we three always try to get together about every two months or so for lunch anyway. Barbara gave Kelly piano lessons years ago. Kelly is excellent, but my sister is the master! (ha) Barb plays with such an anointing. To me it is the best.


I will close for now. Have a good night, Dr Pepper, dear friend of mine...


Love,
Rebecca Rebecca's Red Rose





From: Bob
Subject: Re: Rebecca is sleepy
Date: March 31, 2009, 10:09:15 PM EDT
To: Rebecca


Hi Rebecca!


Just checked my e-mail before going to bed. You may already have gone to bed. But just in case you're still up, I thought I'd write a quick note. Words do not express just how much you bless me. I really enjoy your e-mails. You bring a smile to my face and often make me laugh. Thank you, my dear friend!


I will get up early tomorrow morning for the men's fellowship at the coffee shop. It was raining and chilly last week and there were only 3 others (all preachers from 3 different churches) and me. Maybe more men will be there tomorrow. After that I will have breakfast at Julie's and then run a couple of errands before coming home.


I got a little bit done on OFC today. Still a lot more to do. I was very tired this evening and decided to watch a movie. This morning I changed the sheets on my bed and dusted the headboard shelves and dresser and side table before putting clean sheets on the bed. I washed the ones I took off the bed and they're still in the dryer. I'll wait until tomorrow and run the dryer a few minutes before taking them out and folding them and putting them away.


I'll close for now. Rest well. Until soon...


The "Dr."





From: Bob
Subject: Where's Rebecca?
Date: April 1, 2009, 6:40 PM EDT
To: Rebecca


Hi Rebecca!


As you probably know by now, I finished this week's episode of OFC today. I was surprised. I just kept working on it, and was surprised when I realized that in another hour or so it would be finished.


I didn't go anywhere today. I was planning to get up early and go to the coffee shop downtown for the men's fellowship. But I didn't sleep well last night, and when the alarm went off I looked outside and saw that it was pouring down rain so I decided to go back to bed. I'll do my errands in town either tomorrow or Friday.


I hope you had a good day and will have a good night.


I'm hoping I can sleep better tonight.


As you can see, there is not much happening here at Bob's house. Maybe tomorrow...


Love and blessings,


Your special friend, Bob





From: Rebecca
Subject: Re: Where's Rebecca? HERE I AM!
Date: April 1, 2009, 10:58:28 PM EDT
To: Bob


Here I am Bob! Home at last!


I went to lunch with Barb and our girlfriend Kelly today. I got home at 3 p.m. --- went by Dollar General --- came home -- practiced a song --- and went to class at 5:30 p.m. .... we got out of class about 9 p.m. ---- so here I am. I did have fun today. We went to lunch, I saw old friends there and said "hi" to them. The teaching in class tonight was excellent. It was about talking and saying the right things instead of negative things.


So I will be at church tomorrow all day. I am going to buy a laptop computer when I get back from your house. I have been wanting one for a long time. Barb said they could get one at Office Depot and said I could make small payments to them every month. So I am excited about that.


I just read OFC --- so good! Your work is excellent, Bob. What a great gift you have!


I have TBN on TV, but I think I will go to bed soon.
Be blessed and thanks for all your encouragement --- you are a very special friend. Your e-mails always put a smile on my face.


Much love,
Rebecca Rebecca's Red Rose





From: Bob
Subject: A note from Rich Mountain
Date: April 2, 2009, 11:09 AM
To: Rebecca


Hi Rebecca!


Thanks for your response! I enjoyed it. Sounds like you had a good (busy) (and fun) day yesterday. Good for you!


It makes me smile to learn that my e-mails always put a smile on your face. Yours always make me smile as well. Thanks!


Not much happening here so far. I have been thinking about getting rid of some of the clutter that I have in my studio and elsewhere in the house and garage. I used to be more organized, but have gone through a period (years) of confusion. I wondered if being confused was part of growing old. But now that I seem to be getting less confused, I think it might have had something to do with the depression during Sylvia's long critical illness and after her passing.


I'm going to stay home today and get a few things organized to take to the dump tomorrow. While I'm out, I plan to run my errands in town, refill prescriptions, do a little shopping, etc.


It is already lunch time and I have so little to show for my time so far. Maybe I'll get more done this afternoon. I can always use some rest, so I'll do some of that too. :-)


Hope you're having a good day. Keep smiling!


Love and blessings,


Bob





From: Rebecca
Subject: A note from Rebecca
Date: April 2, 2009, 7:06:09 PM EDT
To: Bob


Good afternoon Bob,


I stopped at the store on the way home from the office in the rain and picked up a few groceries. I am now settling down and getting some laundry ready to wash. Then I can relax for the evening. I can sleep in in the morning! (yeah!)


I am so glad you are feeling less depressed and confused. I was the same way right after my divorce, so I believe it is a time when our minds, and bodies, go through trauma, and it definitely affects our lives. Then, as time goes on, and as we pray for God's peace and comfort to come into our lives, we get "ourselves" back, only better, because we have drawn closer to God in our trial.


I am starting to make notes in preparation to write an article entitled "How to Survive an Emotional Trauma".


I hope you have a relaxing evening and a great day tomorrow.


Keep that smile on ----- it makes you feel good inside just to smile. Have you noticed that? It's like giving your whole body a signal to be happy and operate as God created it to operate.


I'll close for now.
See ya soon!
Love and a hug!
Rebecca Rebecca's Red Rose





From: Bob
Subject: Re: A note from Rebecca
Date: April 2, 2009, 9:19 PM EDT
To: Rebecca


Rebecca,


Thanks for the hug. Here's one for you.


The article you're writing, "How to Survive an Emotional Trauma", is an excellent idea (inspired by God actually) and one that will be very helpful to the readers of Bette's Daily Christian Journal website (and any other media you publish it in).


Thanks for the confirmation that what I am thinking is correct about my fading feelings of depression and confusion being related to the stress of taking care of Sylvia 24/7 for years and then the vacancy that was left in my life when the Lord's angels took her Home, and the adjustments I've been having to make and continue to make in my life. I thought I was close to the Lord before, but I feel even closer now. It is encouraging and comforting and confirming that as you said, we get ourselves back, only better, because we have drawn closer to God in our trial. You are very, very wise, Rebecca. It is a gift from God.


I did some vacuuming today. Hard work at my age (and lack of regular exercise, which I'm determined to change). Tammy will be here Monday to do some cleaning, but there will still be plenty for her to do. Especially the first time, since I have done so little cleaning all winter long. I'm thinking that if she can come just once a month, that may be enough. I'll see what she thinks about it and how much it will cost, and whether I can afford any more often if she thinks that is needed.


Yes, smiling (and laughter) does make me feel better. Once in a while when a lively tune comes on the radio and I'm standing up, I find myself "dancing" to the beat. The reason I put quotes around "dancing" is because I don't know how to dance. I came to understand too late that it wouldn't have been sinful if Sylvia and I had danced together, especially in private.


I trust that you will have a restful night and a happy day tomorrow. See you soon. Just a little over a month.


Goodnight...


Bob





From: Rebecca
Subject: Re: A note from Rebecca
Date: April 3, 2009, 11:14:07 AM EDT
To: Bob


Good morning, dearest friend,


I loved it when you said you "dance" sometimes when you are by yourself and hear some music you like. I do the same thing! (ha) I don't know how to dance either, but it sure is fun to "do our own thing" isn't it!


Barb gave me a plaque a few months ago that says "Dance like no one is watching." I saw this plaque some time ago and loved it, so Barb went back and bought it for me. I have it right here on the wall of my living room so I can see it every day. So, let's keep dancin'!!! Keep lovin' life!!!!


I am so glad that Tammy is going to clean house for you! That will be a great blessing to you in so many ways.


I am just now drinking my first cup of coffee this morning. The sun is shining in through the windows and I don't have to do one thing today if I so desire ..... It is a good feeling.


I thank God every single day for my life, and everything He has provided for me. Even though at times I feel all alone. I know He is with me. Even now, as I write this, tears come to my eyes --- and I don't know why. (Thank you for returning the hug. I needed it.)


I am glad you like the idea of the new article I am working on. You are a great encourager to me. Thank you, Bob. I appreciate you more than you know.


I will close for right now, and will write more a little later today.
Sending you blessings and joy -----
Keep dancing! Keep soaring!


Love
Rebecca Rebecca's Red Rose





From: Bob
Subject: Re: A note from Rebecca
Date: April 3, 2009, 7:40 PM EDT
To: Rebecca


Good evening dearest friend!


Your e-mail blessed me, as all of yours do. Thanks! I'm glad I have been an encouragement to you. You are to me as well. I thank God for my special sisters -- you and Bette. I told Suzanne that you and Bette and I are the "3 Musketeers". :-)


What you said about the dancing made me smile. I guess if you could see my dancing, you would not only smile, you would laugh out loud. :-)


When Bette was here last year, she had a small coffee percolator that she used in her bathroom so she could have coffee before she came upstairs. She left it with me when she went back home, but I have not used it. I've only had coffee here at home a couple of times since then, but it was the instant kind. I always have coffee when I have breakfast in a restaurant, but haven't bothered to fix it myself. I don't think I know how. I guess that sounds sort of silly.


I know what you mean about tears coming to your eyes and you don't know why. That happens to me a lot. I have a theory or two, though. I've just about figured out that it usually happens to me when there is a strong presence of the Lord and His love. Other times it seems to happen when I hear about or think about someone who is experiencing something that the Lord feels strongly about and He wants me to feel what He is feeling and for me to pray for that person. Does that make sense?


You said you appreciate me more that I know. That makes me feel good. I appreciate you too.


I took some trash and bottles and cans and paper and cardboard to the county distribution center (we don't have trash pickup outside the city limits). Then I realized I only had my car keys and not my house keys. At first it startled me. Where did I lose them??? Did I leave them in the pair of pants I wore yesterday? Have I got myself locked out of the house? But I have a key hidden outside in case that ever happens (and one time it did). Then I remembered leaving the key to the garage door in the garage door. The house and other keys are on the same ring. I had gone to the garage to get the bags of trash and put them in the car. I left the key in the door because I intended to go back for something, but never did. And I forgot about the keys and the open door. So even though it was a 20-minute trip back up the mountain, I went back to get the keys because they could be used to open every outside door in the house, and I planned to be gone most of the day.


My keys were where I had left them. I locked the garage door and went back down the mountain, all the way back past the distribution center on my way to Pisgah Fish Camp where I had lunch (salad bar and hot bar -- flounder was the entree). From there I went to WalMart for a few things. Then CVS to get my prescription refill. Then to Dollar General to get some birthday cards. Then to the grocery store. Then home. I repaired a torn piece of tile in the half bath off my bedroom. And then cleaned out the vacuum so it will be ready for Tammy to use when she comes. And some other chores. And then fixed myself a ham and cheese sandwich which I had for supper along with some potato salad I got at the grocery store deli.


Now I am very tired, but not ready to go to bed. I may watch a movie. I have another e-mail to write first. So I'll say goodnight. Sleep well. Bye for now...


Much love and many blessings,


Bob





From: Rebecca
Subject: Re: A note from Rebecca
Date: April 3, 2009, 11:52:51 PM EDT
To: Bob


Good evening dear Bob ----


The 3 musketeers are going to put some music on and "dance the night away"!!! I can see it now!


About the coffee --- I am going to teach you how to make a wonderful cup of coffee when I get there, so you can enjoy it whenever you wish.


I just got home. Bette had invited me to go to a Spring Concert with her out at the college. It was very nice. I really enjoyed it. Afterwards Bette and I went to Steak and Shake for hamburgers. We were hungry!


It was a miracle that your keys were still there in the garage door! Thank goodness you remembered where they were before you started all of your errands! You did a lot in one day!! I don't know if I can keep up with you or not when we visit. I should start walking for some exercise.


I think I will head for bed now --- thank you for just "being you". You are very special to me, dear friend of mine.


Yes, I will sleep well ---- and that is my prayer for you tonight too, my special friend.


Much love,
Rebecca Rebecca's Red Rose





From: Rebecca
Subject: Saturday Morning with Rebecca
Date: April 4, 2009, 9:56:35 AM EDT
To: Bob


Good Morning "Dr"


How are you this morning? I am having my first cup of coffee, of course, and just waking up, slowly. I slept really well last night -- hope you did too. I felt your prayer for me. Thank you from my heart.


It's a sunny day and I am going to go to Pennys, I think, this afternoon.


Have a lovely morning. Make it beautiful.
You are definitely one of God's special and favorite sons.


Much love and prayers ---- and a Saturday morning hug!
Rebecca Rebecca's Red Rose





From: Rebecca
Subject: Fwd: Rebecca -- Publish
Date: April 5, 2009, 4:13 PM EDT
To: Bob


Here is a copy of my new article ----


HOW TO SURVIVE AN EMOTIONAL TRAUMA


Emotional trauma is a condition that may cause severe mental and physical stress, and over time, could lead to chronic stress. This could eventually affect your circulatory system, respiratory system, immune system, and your digestive system. Traumatizing events can take a serious toll on those involved.


An emotional trauma contains three common elements:
a) It was unexpected.
b) The person was unprepared.
c) There was nothing the person could do to prevent it from happening.


Considering all of this information, you can easily understand how an emotional trauma can affect your behavior. Life is the survival of pain. No one else has ever felt your pain, exactly like you. You can learn to focus your pain for change, and allow your pain to start working for you!


Key #1 -- Pain passes. Remember this. Your pain is only for a season, so use it as a bridge to change and promotion. "I (the Lord) will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go, I will guide you with My eye" (Psalm 32:8).


After my divorce, God granted me such peace, I immediately wanted to reach out to people whose hearts had been broken and torn apart. I realized there were so many people that needed the healing that I had received from God. I could see the brokenness, the confusion, and the hopelessness in their eyes. I had a strong desire to tell them how to survive an emotional trauma! That's why I started writing my book -- Soaring on Angels' Wings.


Key #2 -- Draw close to God in your trial. Run to Him! As you pray for God's peace and comfort, you will "get yoursel back," only better, because you have drawn closer to God in your trial. This is an important key to survival. Be consistent in your prayer time. When you are emotionally traumatized, your thinking ability can become "blurred" and Satan can easily find an open door into your life, unless you are reading the word of God and confessing His healing power in your life.


Key #3 -- You need spiritual support to survive! Be sure you have faithful prayer partners and trusted friends to pray with you and for you on a daily basis. I believe that God will send the right person into your life that will be a strong encourager and support to you at this particular time.


Key #4 -- Do not isolate yourself! You may feel like hiding from the world at this time, but this is a number one strategy of Satan! If he can keep you isolated, he will attempt to torment you with negative thoughts that are designed to destroy you. Do not allow this to happen!


Keep your trust in God. This is a very important key to surviving an emotional trauma. Every answer you need to all of your questions is in God's word, the Holy Bible. Place your life in His hands. He is the One who can give you the inner peace and joy that you so desperately long to have during this heart-wrenching trial.


My dear friend, there is hope. Don't give up. I am living proof that you can survive. I experienced emotional trauma during my painful divorce -- but more importantly, I have experienced great healing -- and I know it can happen for you. God's healing touch is for everyone! My main mission is to give you the solutions, the answers, that you are so desperately searching for at this time in your life.


"When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their distress and troubles" (Psalm 34:17 Amplified).


You are not alone. You are not the only one who has walked this road. There are those of us who have not only survived an emotional trauma, but we have overcome, and we are continuing our journey in victory! With God, all things are possible! I encourage you -- do not bring your past into your future! Stop talking about your past and start talking about your future! It's time to move on and become all that God has created you to be.


"You have turned my mourning into dancing for me, You have put off my sackcloth and girded me with gladness" (Psalm 30:11 Amplified). You can survive an emotional trauma and live in victory and freedom. All things are possible with God!


~ Rebecca





From: Bob
Subject: Re: Rebecca -- Publish
Date: April 5, 2009, 5:08:38 PM EDT
To: Rebecca


Super-duper article, Rebecca! Outstanding! You really have a wonderful gift from the Lord. A gift to you, which not only benefits you, but also benefits all who read your writings, and in this case those who have experienced emotional trauma.


Thanks so much for sharing. Also thanks for your sweet response to my earlier e-mail.


I still haven't done anything today on OFC. I will start that now, then stop for supper, and then maybe do some more work before bedtime.


Rest well tonight...


Your friend, Dr. Pepper






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